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​IF, MONEY, FAME AND GLAMOUR CAN'T BRING ONE HAPPINESS THAN WHAT?

Tuesday - March 20, 2018 7:43 pm , Category : WTN SPECIAL

By Jaya Khare


The world is running after Money, Fame, Glamour, to stay happy, in search of happiness and contentment. But all in vain, even after achieving above said, one is not happy and content, Why?

After long years of studies of tons of documents and research work, Harvard had published the secret of being happy. In the longest with the most cumbersome loaded documents of study and research work for 75 years, Harvard has released the secret of being happy.



 

What makes you happy? What keeps us happy and healthy as we go through life? If you think it's fame and money, you're not alone but, according to the most extended study on happiness, according to psychiatrist Robert Waldinger, you're mistaken. As the director of the 75-year-old research on adult development, Waldinger has unprecedented access to data on real happiness and satisfaction.

The most extended search over millions of people when asked what will make them happy and the half of the people said if they become rich and another half tells they want to be famous!

If we take down the memory lane, or if we could watch the time or unfold life with time, precisely is what the Harvard study of adult life did, which is the outcome of 75 years of research work. Going through the life stories of hundreds, covering many aspects of their living, Harvard undertook the combination of thousands of people out of which  724 men are still alive and are in 90's. The study of their 2000 children, indicates the outcome. 1938 onwards Harvard started, studying and tracking the life of these in two groups. 1st one were those who went to the college and finished their studies by  2nd world war and after finishing college went to serve in the war, the other group is from  Boston foster neighbourhood, this group is of boys from deprived families and were like not having enough resources for a good living even to the extent that had less of running cold or hot water at home. When they enter to study, these were interviewed, medically examined, interviews used to happen at their home, Harvard researchers interviewed their parents. 

With changing time this group of boys grew up into adults, they become, doctor, lawyer, one became president of the USA, some developed alcoholism, some became labours, factory workers,  some climb the ladder of social journey to reach the top, and some took the opposite side of journey to end in negative life.

The conductors of this study had never imagined that psychiatrist Robert Waldinger someday would stand and after 75 years will reveal the studies outcome. The researchers
 interviewed in their living room; they draw their blood to study them,  they study their brains, spoken to the wives and family members too. 


What lesson we get from tons of thousands of page of information generated on this line of work? Is fame brings happiness or it's hard work, money or glamour? The clearest message this 75 years of study leads to Lessons is,which tells Mr Robert Waldinger is : 

 

Could Relationships Keeps us Happier and Healthier!

Three big lessons about relationships: 

1: The social connections are good. Those who lead connected lives are happier, healthier live longer. Lonely life is toxic, those who live alone and isolated life are sad and unhappy. Social connection is good for us. People who are more isolated, they are less happy, their brain decline sooner, and they end unhappily. 



2: It's not the numbers of friends one has, or whether in a relationship or committed relationship, but its the quality of your relationship that matters. Living in high conflicts without affection is dangerous perhaps worse than getting a divorce. The study shows midlife can predict who will grow at the age of 80 happily. Warm relationships are protective: the happy health OXYGENARIAN comes out at the age of 50 to those who were most satisfies with their relationship at 50 and were healthiest at age 80. At the age of  50, the cholesterol generation does not affect old age but a relationship does. Good close relationship buffers us from some of sling and arrow of getting old. The researchers notice people at 80's in a good relationship were happier and in a good mood even when going through physical pain. 


3: Good relationships protect not only our body but our brains: Memory is sharp of those being in a securely attached relationship at 80's these people stay sharp. Good relationship not necessarily has to be smooth all the time, couple bicker day in day out, but if one feels they can count while going tough time it does not affect memory, the argument did not damage memory.

Wisdom is the hill,  hard to get and easy to ignore, relationships are messy and complicated, it not only sexy or glamorous but lifelong and never ends, happiest in retirement is happiness. Workmates than Playmates, we look at life to quick fix, fare the best are the people with relationships.

Fame and wealth for good life are needed to go, but for happier life over and over in 75 years the study shows, those who lean into relationships with family and friend people with communities are healthier and happier. Replacing screen time with people time, date night, reaching out to that family member you have not taken from long, take out walk together.

Time is so brief in life for, feuds, apologies, calling to account, bickering and heartburn, time is only for loving; a good life is built on good relationships. - Window To News


 

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